{"id":4447,"date":"2023-06-23T17:00:13","date_gmt":"2023-06-23T17:00:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.realtrends.com\/blog\/2023\/06\/23\/3-ways-to-stop-the-hustle-and-forge-real-relationships\/"},"modified":"2025-03-13T02:51:46","modified_gmt":"2025-03-13T02:51:46","slug":"3-ways-to-stop-the-hustle-and-forge-real-relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.realtrends.com\/blog\/2023\/06\/23\/3-ways-to-stop-the-hustle-and-forge-real-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"3 ways to stop the hustle and forge real relationships"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>We\u2019ve all been there: Hustling for referrals around the clock. Attending endless get-to-know-you breakfasts, coffees, happy hours, and charity events. Viewing real human beings as nothing more than prospects and leads for our sales funnels. Feeling stagnant as we get nowhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What are we doing wrong?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>These top-of-mind sales tactics keep us \u201cin front of\u201d rather than \u201cwith\u201d people. It\u2019s a good start, but these actions keep us focused on staying relevant rather than real. The age of putting up a business front is over.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Technology, artificial intelligence, and automation are replacing many of the moving parts of real estate transactions. Once this transformation is complete, all that will be left is our ability to forge real, heart-centered human connections \u2014 something technology won\u2019t be able to replicate or replace, at least not anytime soon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Taking a &#8220;top of heart&#8221; worldview<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Being \u201ctop of heart\u201d is about relearning what human nature already knows: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.realtrends.com\/blog\/articles\/top-agent-jessie-weno-dominguez-find-personal-fulfillment-through-real-estate\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Relationships<\/a>, including business relationships, originate from the heart, not the head. A top of heart worldview is about getting real with others as you build genuine and meaningful human connections, and then simply allowing business to flow as a result.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How can you start?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Get intentional. <\/strong>Let your heart lead the way as you <a href=\"https:\/\/www.realtrends.com\/blog\/articles\/gary-keller-discusses-the-constant-of-change-in-real-estate\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">shift your business<\/a> to become more human.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As you sit down with a client, associate, or vendor, ask yourself: What are some ways you can set aside the business at hand to care for the person in front of you? How can you be more human in this moment? How would you like the other person to <em>feel<\/em> at the end of this <a href=\"https:\/\/www.realtrends.com\/blog\/category\/real-estate\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">interaction<\/a>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Let\u2019s imagine you\u2019re having lunch with a client who\u2019s thinking about selling her home. Her husband has already moved out, and they\u2019re separating. It\u2019s clear that she\u2019s struggling with this huge, emotional life event.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Rather than pounce on the transactional opportunity, slow down and honor the emotion. Set the business aside for a moment and allow your client to lead the way. When you see the human in front of you \u2014 and not just the transaction \u2014 you\u2019ll form a top of heart relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Get curious.<\/strong> Get curious about others in ways that are relevant and useful.<strong> <\/strong>How can you best serve the person you\u2019re with? What are their hopes? Their dreams? Their fears?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Ask open-ended questions to learn what\u2019s in another person\u2019s heart. For example, you might say: \u201cTell me, what\u2019s exciting in your life right now?\u201d Or, upon learning your client\u2019s daughter is heading off to school out of state, you might exclaim, \u201cHow exciting that Carly is going off to college! What\u2019s your dream for her? And how do you feel about that?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As you feel empathy and compassion in the conversation, pay attention. These moments can be markers indicating an opportunity to connect more deeply. As we develop stronger bonds, we form a team; \u201cyou\u201d and \u201cme\u201d is replaced with \u201cwe.\u201d We face life\u2019s celebrations and challenges together. As a bonus, when selling a house becomes the challenge, we\u2019re the obvious first call.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Get aligned. <\/strong>Take note of the emotions, goals, interests, and experiences you share with other people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As emotion bubbles up in your conversations, explore how it can strengthen your relationships. Practice acknowledging others\u2019 feelings by sharing your observations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For example, let\u2019s say your buyer says, \u201dI don\u2019t feel like the sellers are telling us the whole story about that repair they did last year.\u201d You could say, \u201cIt sounds like you\u2019re losing some trust with these people. Am I right, or am I totally off base?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>With this simple response, you\u2019re getting to the heart of the matter rather than making an assumption. Once you learn your buyer\u2019s truth, you\u2019ll be able to respond with support and empathy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Acknowledging your buyer\u2019s emotion \u2014 whether it\u2019s fear or anger or uncertainty \u2014 will bring you closer and build trust between you. It will deepen your human connection. This intersection between a genuine, trusting relationship and your real estate expertise is where all the referrals live.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-the-takeaway\">The takeaway<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The quality of our lives can be measured by the quality of our relationships. When we slow down and get intentional, curious, and aligned with others, our lives get better.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We don\u2019t have to hustle from one networking event to another, exchanging countless business cards, to reach our goals in real estate. When we invest in the quality of our relationships, our referrals will multiply, and business will take care of itself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em><strong>Grant Muller<\/strong> is a Certified High Performance Coach\u2122 and a team leader with the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.grantmuller.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong>Grant Muller Group of Compass<\/strong><\/a> and is on a mission to help high achievers who have tried every tool and tactic to sell more, achieve more, and find more fulfillment but aren\u2019t quite making the progress they desire.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Being \u201ctop of heart\u201d is about relearning what human nature already knows: Relationships originate from the heart, not the head.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":39478,"featured_media":4822,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3255],"tags":[],"coauthors":[3187],"class_list":["post-4447","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-archive"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v25.4 (Yoast SEO v26.8) - 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